Tuesday, October 18, 2005

The Harsh Reality Must Be Setting In

Its not been two days since I, Super Lucky Crazy Monkey #8 took control of the Hippo's Ass and already we have someone beating down our doors trying to get an article published.

Super Lucky Crazy Moneky #8 says this is all going according to plan. The former editor of the HA, a man I like to call Scott Trotsky said that the day someone submitted an article to the HA would be the day monkeys fly outta his ass. Well Comrades, the day is almost here. Super Lucky Crazy Monkey #8 sees a future bright with submissions submitted to force this monkey into submission.

A Very Special Guest was supposed to be here today to make his picks of this week's losers, but he's tied up at the moment trying to prove "The Man" blew up the levees in New Orleans. So Super Lucky Crazy Monkey #8 is going to put off our Calypso friend till tomorrow.

Meanwhile... back at the Ranch.

A Kessler's Moment

$500 for Playoff Tickets
$11.50 for two Hotdogs and coke
$7 for souvenir “We’re # 1!” foam finger
Slipping your octogenarian wife some tongue while the whole world watches and not caring because you were once President of the United States. Priceless

Adding Insult to Injury

Loonies in the Grass owner Hal, is no longer scratching his head wondering if he made the right move to keep both Harrison and Mannin this year. The duo earned an NFL record 86 touchdown passes, breaking the mark set by San Francisco's Steve Young and Jerry Rice. Indianapolis won the game, 45-28.

Afterward, Harrison handed the ball to Manning who trotted to the sideline with it before the two perennial Pro Bowl selections debated how to slice it up.
"He had it, he gave it to me, I gave it back to him and he gave it back to me," Manning said. "We're going to try to cut it in half, that's the way it should be."

And Finally...

Super Lucky Crazy Moneky #8 says, "As if the world isn't crazy enough...

David Copperfield says he plans to impregnate a girl on stage - without even touching her.
Speaking to German magazine Galore, the illusionist rejected the theory that there were only seven different kinds of magic tricks.
He said: "Bull s**t! There is a great deal of new territory to conquer. In my next show I'm going to make a girl pregnant on stage."
He added: "Naturally it will be without sex. Everyone will be happy about it, but I'm not telling you any more."
The magician is currently on tour in Germany with his show, An Intimate Evening of Grand Illusion.

Meanwhile, God issued a press release stating "Been there, done that!"

Finally Part II

This week's LOST is the last one for two weeks. Point to Ponder. Is Hurley's Boss and Locke's boss ONE IN THE SAME?!?!?!? Super Lucky Crazy Moneky #8 wonders if Monkeys will be featured on the show soon....

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